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Fun Northampton Notes

So, here's some quick notes for you the person at home. On the Metropolitan Opera broadcasts I've listened to in my mother's house, these would be the things that Peter Allen would say while waiting for James Levine to get off his fat ass and start the fucking Opera, already. In this case, you can just pretend they're being said by Bob Costas and Deborah Norville, and therefore they're vapid.

The Northampton City Hall seems to be a fake castle. Up to and including turrets.

Turrets.

Several of them. Not one turret. One turret would look silly, after all. If you're going with turrets, you have to go for the full monty. They look like they should be flying pennants while bit actors in helmets ready boiling oil to be poured down onto protesting and invading hipsters.

As for said hipsters... the ratio of young, attractive men and women to old, broken down people seems to be seventy-four to one in favor of youth, out on the rain slicked streets of Northampton. It's skewed in here because there aren't seventy four people in this room and by definition, I am.

As near as I can tell, the Virgin Mary is considered an ironic and somewhat hip interior decorating choice.

Also? Santa Rita of Cascia.

Santa Rita's story can be found here. She seems to have been an interesting and forgiving woman, and a nice choice for a saint. I'm not an expert, but still -- I'm behind this particular canonization one hundred percent.

For the record, Santarita.com seems to be a Chilean winery. From woman granted stigmata of the forehead from Christ's Thorny Crown for the last fifteen years of a woman who suffered untold tribulations with grace and forgiveness to Cabernet Sauvignon in one easy step.

Of course, that might be in reference to a different Santa Rita. Check the comments for Catholics up on their female saints.

I seem to have strayed from my original topic of discussion. In conclusion, cute girls with tattoos still fucking rock. Thank you, and try the lattes.

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So far as I can tell (there are way too many saints to memorize a list, unless that's your thing), there's only one Saint Rita, being Saint Margarita of Cascia, also known as Rita La Abogada de Imposibles (literally translated 'The Lawyer of Impossible', accurately translated as 'Saint of the Impossible'). Seeing as she's the patron saint of the (seemingly) impossible cause or (seemingly) hopeless situation, she's not exactly a comforting motif for a City Hall, although no doubt quite apt. Anyone looking to find out more about the stigmata of thorns that she bore can check it out for themselves, apparently the body is kept at the St. Augustine church in Cascia, Italy, and apparently the body s surprisingly unrotted even though she's been dead for nearly 550 years now, and the stigmata is apparently still visible.

Am I the only one that read the last sentence of BigJT's comment and immediately thought, "AAAAAAAAH! Vampire!!"

Yes?

Oh.

I could be wrong, but I don't think sainthood would agree with a vampire.

Or maybe... you'd end up with a cross-proof vampire... Oh no! Cross-proof vampires! Run for your lives you poor Italian fools! Run!!!

Okay, I'm done now.

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